sexy finance

I just can't handle it when teachers in the college of business refer to class material as "sexy". This week, my real estate teacher did so. "We're not really going to talk about the sexy stuff this term, we just don't have time." Last semester, my strategic management teacher, during one of the first classes, announced, "Yeah, we'll get to the sexy stuff later in the term, but first we must cover this..." It has happened a few other times during my four years at Auburn. What "sexy stuff"? I still don't know what they're talking about. I'm sorry to break it to you, teach, but there is nothing sexy about finance, or business really, in my opinion. Anyway...

Despite the bitterness I have towards my sexy major, I have felt a little more optimistic about the job search this week. I haven't filled out any more applications yet, but I have several that I'm planning on. A lot of my friends and family are asking what kinds of jobs I'm looking at, so here are some of the job titles from different companies I am looking at:

Account Manager

Associate Account Manager

Financial Support Worker

Office Professional

Insurance Account Executive

Legal Assistant (pretty excited about this one)

Teacher in Saudi Arabia (it's not at the top of my list, but you never know...)

These are just some of the jobs out there that correspond to my major. What I'd really like to do is move out to California and start writing a screenplay, or go to film school, or write for a magazine of some sort, or maybe work at a publishing company. But the reality is, I don't think I've had enough experience in any area to really know what I want to do. I have been blessed with a college degree and I want to value it and use it, even if it's just for a year. I would love to go back to school for an English degree, but I don't know if that's what the Lord wants right now, or what I want. It's so hard to distinguish between selfish desires and Godly ones. When I think about writing sometimes, though I really do want to influence people for God's glory in sharing my beliefs, my thought process starts marathoning down Self Glory Lane. I'm afraid of any type of fame or pride that might come from work. But the odds are, I will meet it somehow, as does everyone.

This week, my memory verse was about temptation (1 Corinthians 10:13). I tend to think I don't struggle with temptation much. This is far from true, as there are so many types of temptation, not just the traditional ones I think about. A verse mentioned at Crusade the other night helped me see just how much I do, in fact, struggle with it, specifically as it relates to lust for a good-looking post-graduate life, for all my peers to see.

"But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust." -James 1:14

Speaking of "post-graduate", I saw a trailer a few months ago for a new movie coming out in August and I immediately identified with the protagonist. I may be in the same situation she is in in about a month, though I don't think a handsome Latino neighbor is waiting for me back in Dothan. Check it out.

http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox_searchlight/postgrad/

forced to trust

"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them." - Ephesians 2:10

"I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me." - Galatians 2:20

"For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline." - 2 Timothy 1:7

"'For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart." - Jeremiah 29:11-13

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." - Joshua 1:9

"I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made....skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth" - Psalm 139:14,15 (emphasis mine)

"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has chosen gladly to give you the kingdom." - Luke 12:32

"...'Master, Master, we are perishing!' And He got up and rebuked the wind and the surging waves, and they stopped, and it became calm. And He said to them, 'Where is your faith?'" - Luke 8:24, 25

As far as I know, I don't have a single plan, event, appointment, trip, or any place to be at all after August 10, 2009. Not a one. I have no school schedule or work schedule or anything really from which to work around, and this is the first time that my situation has been such in my entire life. On the balancing scale (I just tried to type "scale" and it came out "scare", go figure!) of fear and excitement in regard to this new situation of mine, my thoughts tend to tip to the fear side way too often.

My fear emerges simply from this: a lack of trust in the Lord's sovereignty, love, and every other immense power He has. The above are some verses, some truths, that I have recently been and am presently clinging to, meditating on. I am trying to claim these promises and walk in the absolute truth of them. What amazing love! He skillfully wrought me. Whenever I feel like I'm kind of insignificant (kind of a no-talent consumer, you know?), I remember this. He wouldn't have so carefully and skillfully constructed me if I He didn't love me. This summer, He has definitely been stopping me, teaching me, and letting me just ponder His love and His purposes, purposes that are so much bigger than just me. I am far from abandoned, though my vision is blurred as to what God will do with me come August.

I am forced to trust.

"Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord and whose trust is the Lord. For he will be like a tree planted by water, that extends its roots by a stream and will not fear when the heat comes; but its leaves will be green, and it will not be anxious in a year of drought nor cease to yield fruit." - Jeremiah 17:7-8