year one, down

I graduated from college one year ago today. I can't believe it has been a whole year. I don't feel like I've moved very far (literally, haha). I have lived in my parents' house, month after month. Watched television and eaten meals with my family, night after night. Worked restlessly at a bank, day after day. I don't have a lot of exciting stories from this year.

I know I sound like a brat. Ungrateful, even. And I know I often appear pessimistic.

But I know God is still God, and He is working everywhere, in schools and in friends' lives and in India and in corporate offices, and I am growing in Him. And for that I am thankful, and in that I find rest.

Now if I could just get over myself, and start living out this quote that my friend Sarah shared on her blog not long ago, and that I haven't stopped thinking about since:

Develop an interest in life as you see it; the people, things, literature, music - the world is so rich, simply throbbing with rich treasures, beautiful souls, and interesting people. Forget yourself. - Henry Miller

And (dare I say it again?) I really, really, want to begin writing at least weekly, if not daily, like my friend Michelle has committed to do.

I read today in Charles Spurgeon's Morning and Evening that Christ is the "spring of our actions". That really excites me. I am not a "make it happen" type of person. I'm a "watch it happen" person (thus, movie freak). But there has to be some action. And I think action begins when we start obeying. And the Spirit tells us how to obey. I think I don't see action in my life because I am fearful, and lazy, and I resist His beckoning. I'm mostly talking about little things here, like phone calls and preparing my own meals and practicing playing my guitar instead of just staring at it. Through daily obedience, I think God invites us to see the bigger picture, because it takes the focus off of ourselves. So that's what I'm going to try to do.